Take life as a card game where you play with the hand dealt with you.

Nurture the life you made. Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

Work In Progress.

Yes, that’s how our lives are. It’s a constant pursuit and not an end goal to be met. We all wish to lead a different life than the one we made ourselves. What an irony? Isn’t it?

Something built by our actions, labor and hard work fails to suffice. The longing for a better prospect sets in throughout the entire course, only to leave us exhausted and frustrated.

Yes, things could have been different, but they are not, and that’s all there is. Keep wishing for better things, and they are only adding to the misery.

Having said that, why not make the best of what you have? 

After all, you made it the way it is. It serves better if you can take responsibility for it rather than cribbing and loathing about how insufficient your lives are. 

If you detest not having enough money in the bank, think of those who struggle to get a one-time meal.

If you crave a better body, spare a thought for people with deformities.

I don’t want to sound all philosophical and kill those raging “I want different and better” hormones of yours. It’s imperative to grow, but stop chasing an alternate life and make the best of what you have. 

I’ve always wanted something else since I could remember. 

The school mortified me, so I wanted the college.

I dreaded college, so I craved a job.

The job then made me realize how deeply satisfying my college and school times were.

The thing is, we believe that the grass is greener on the other side, but the fact is, it gets greener where you water it. 

The indispensable lesson learned- keep nurturing your life like you nurture a plant or the grass, and then check the grass color. While we pursue a path that is not for our’s to live, have we made an honest attempt to create the best version possible for us?

Give up the fight, not dreams

The tragedy is we crave mess and complexity. We can make peace with our lives, but do we want that?

We fight reality and try to force things. The natural flow of things bothers us. Peace for some feels like giving up because they are used to constant battles. If there is no conflict, it seems life has stopped.

Fighting reality is a choice we make rather than accepting what is. Your view of other lives is limited to the array of thoughts you have gathered throughout. It fails to provide a clear picture. While you see the success and ease, you fail to notice and register the struggle and pain. Since we already judged ourselves basis how unfulfilling our life is, everything else feels fancy to us.

Acceptance is giving up the fight, not your dreams.

Instead of wishing for a different life, start by making the best of the one you have.

Take life as a card game where you play with the hand dealt with you. You don’t shout or scream for different cards to make a winning hand, but make the best from the available one.

Life is what it is. It will become what you make of it.

Being the peace

Be the peace to be at ease. Making peace is not quitting but accepting reality. It brings clarity of thoughts and charts a better course of action. It is about being open and receptive. When we force things unnaturally, it creates stress. 

Peace comes with acceptance. Acceptance is not resigning but adapting to what is.

Imagine looking at a river flowing in some direction. There is no resistance to the experience of that moment, but observation and acceptance. Had you been upset and thoughtful about its flow and path, the only outcome will be frustration. We treat our life the same way, always wishing for something else other than the one that’s present.

Acceptance helps to calm our frustration. We play with the hand dealt with us instead of expecting different cards.

The explanation to why we wish for a different life is merely due to our skewed expectations. 

We love glitter, not labor. 

We find the lives of others as perfect since we view them superficially. We desire the outcome, not the effort. Our efforts in making our lives seem to fall short of expectations, and the only possible way out is a desire for a different and better life, sans the struggle.

When we stop wishing

As we work around life and our problems, it will give back to us in unexpected ways. It is not hopeless as it may seem for now. We wish for a different one only because we get stuck in a certain way of living with no way out. 

You made this far not to exit, but to keep finding ways to make it better. There will always be solutions to each problem you face.

Your life is astounding with endless probabilities and opportunities, right here and right now at this moment. Uncover your eyes and explore the many facets it offers with numerous moments and events that happen as you live. You have created one life out of scratch, and why let it fall apart. While you wish and crave a different one, millions would kill to have yours.

The magic happens when we stop wishing for something else and accept the one given, and acknowledge that a different and better life has been staring us in the face all along.

Closing thoughts

The critical part is to accept. Once acceptance sets in, there will be renewed vigor to make everything better and different. Acceptance is not cowardice but adapting. It helps you to set things in perspective and make changes as required. Without accepting, there can be no improvement. When we surrender to what is, we view things rationally. A different life is not your way out of the trouble, for who knows how your desire might turn out. 

Wishing a different life means resignation. It means you’ve given up on the one you so dearly made. To make the best of what you have is courage. Appreciate what you’ve built and make it better every day.

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